1
00:00:21,680 --> 00:00:24,060
I'm H -A -P -P -Y.

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I'm H -A -P -P -Y.

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I know I am, I'm sure I am.

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I'm H -A -P -P -Y.

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I know I am, I'm sure I am. He's H -A -P
-P -Y.

6
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Hear that?

7
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Saxophones. Hear it.

8
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There's a dance at the staff social
club. It's rather romantic, isn't it?

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Romantic? It should be stopped.

10
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Why? People in hospital shouldn't have
to listen to that. I bet it's driving

11
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them mad in orthopaedic. All them feet
tapping away inside plaster casts.

12
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I think it's romantic. Can't you imagine
it, Pete?

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Gliding with a beautiful woman through
the dancing throng, turning this way and

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that, under a myriad of glittering
lights, moving as one, hearts beating as

15
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Yeah, and falling over as one.

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That's what would happen if you tried
gliding through the dancing throng,

17
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It's just a brawl these days. It's all
limbo dancing and doing the splits.

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I was a beautiful dancer.

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Full of rhythm.

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Really?

21
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The pot trot, that was my speciality.
Yeah, well, it would be being an hunting

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man. That and throwing bread rolls.

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I didn't throw bread rolls.

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Oh, I remember those mid -thumb of
balls.

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The women beautifully gone, dancing on
the terrace. The music mingling with

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the... A scent of honeysuckle and my
partner, dark and vivacious, following

27
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every move and me in white tie and
tails, bending her to my will.

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Bending her to your will? I thought that
came afterwards, down by the tennis

29
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courts.

30
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I wouldn't expect you to appreciate it,
Figgis. After all, what do you know

31
00:02:03,070 --> 00:02:03,969
about dancing?

32
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Quite a lot, as a matter of fact. You've
obviously never heard of the Roy Figgis

33
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Formation Dancers. Well, they don't
exactly spring to mind. We were very big

34
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the South. We should have won the area
final. Why didn't you? Not enough

35
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sequins.

36
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Then what have you got against the
music? Doesn't it bring it all back to

37
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Oh, that's the trouble. It makes you
realise what you're missing.

38
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Oh, they'll be letting the balloons down
soon. I always enjoyed that. Grabbing

39
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the biggest balloon and bursting
everyone else's with your faggot.

40
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Yes, and then they play The Last Waltz
and you feel that this may be your

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of destiny and you look deep into her
eyes and ask her that question that's

42
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trembling on your lips all evening. Do
you or don't you?

43
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No. Can I see you home? And she says,
now I'm with a friend. And you say,

44
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a pity because I've got my chewing gum
stuck in your ear.

45
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Well, you won't get many refusals down
there tonight because there's a shortage

46
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of men. They say the nurses have to
dance with each other. Oh, what a

47
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waste. I heard that some of the nurses
crept into one of the wards last week

48
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had a last waltz with the patients.

49
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What?

50
00:03:02,131 --> 00:03:03,859
Blimey, why didn't they come in here?

51
00:03:03,860 --> 00:03:07,600
Oh, I could just do with a slow waltz, a
few drinks, soft music.

52
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Why don't we ask them to call on us?

53
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Well, I must say, I find that I don't...

54
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Idea rather attractive. We could use one
of the private rooms. They're usually

55
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standing empty. It's an absolute waste
of a taxpayer's money.

56
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It's a great idea.

57
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We could get some drinks in, have bowls
of crisps, borrow a record player. You

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can count me out. Why?

59
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I can't dance.

60
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What?

61
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What was all that about gliding through
a throng with a beautiful woman, turning

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this way and that under a myriad of
light?

63
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Well, I've often imagined what it would
be like.

64
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I tried it with a book once.

65
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Well, that's the trouble, Norman. You're
supposed to do it with a woman.

66
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You can't learn. from a book. Yes, you
can. You follow these footprints.

67
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Well, what good's that? You want to be a
dancer and attract a dog?

68
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I did go to a dance once.

69
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Well, how did you get on? I was all
right on the straight bits, but I

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turn the corners.

71
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That's because you hadn't mastered the
reverse turn. That's something every

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dancer must know how to turn. You can't
expect them to leave the doors open for

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you. Watch, I'll show you.

74
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Oh, that's very goofy.

75
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Lovely, Roy. Chassé reverse turn.

76
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Cross chassis.

77
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Zigzag.

78
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Fishtank.

79
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Oh, I can do the lot, mate.

80
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Oh, but don't let it get too
complicated.

81
00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:26,750
Why don't you try something simpler?
Come on, do a slow waltz. Do it with me.

82
00:04:26,780 --> 00:04:30,819
Oh, now I feel silly. Come on, you're
far too self -conscious. That's your

83
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trouble. Now, come on. Now, the man
holds the lady's right hand in his left,

84
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palm to palm, thumbs crossed.

85
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Place the right hand under the lady's
shoulder blade very lightly.

86
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No grubby fingers on the brocade, and no
grogan for the bra strap.

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Off we go, and mind the end of me dress.
You all must look happy.

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One, two, three.

89
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One, two, three.

90
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See? It's easy.

91
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Now talk to me.

92
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Talk to you? I can't talk and dance at
the same time. You've got to.

93
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This is your golden opportunity.

94
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You've got me to yourself at last.

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Go on.

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Do you come here often?

97
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Isn't that all you can say?

98
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I should be remarking on the colour of
my eyes, my vivacious good looks.

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Excuse me. Please, gentlemen, one at a
time.

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Oh, hello, Doctor.

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You are getting back into bed things,
aren't you, Norman? I'm sorry, Doctor.

102
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was amusing. It got me going. I was just
jumping over the few steps. Yes, so I

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see. Well, it's not good enough. I'm
disappointed in you figures. Don't

104
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Doctor. He was saving the last waltz for
you.

105
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I hope, Doctor, that last verse of it
was deplorable.

106
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Oh, do you know about it? What does he
know about it? Mr. Topp is the proper

107
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guest on this level, isn't he?

108
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I don't think we...

109
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He got it for ballroom dancing.

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I didn't think it was for surgery.

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What's that, Figgis? I suppose you'll be
going down there later.

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Well, I may go down there and tread a
measure, Figgis. You know, I look at

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Doctor, I can see that you're a dancing
man. It's the way your body is swaying

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to the music.

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I do have this innate sense of rhythm.

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What's it like down there with all the
nurses?

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I bet they get a bit wild when they get
to the bottom of the old fudge bowl.

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Wild? nonsense club. It's all good,
clean, healthy exercise. We have the

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the barn dance, the gag, all... The Paul
Jones?

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Don't forget the Paul Jones.

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What fun that is. What excitement.

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We all join hands and we dance in the
circle like this.

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And when the music stops, who is going
to be there? What will it be? The heart

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is pounding.

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Will it be the thin lady from X -Ray or
the big blonde Rosalind with the

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magnificent...

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want to unsettle them. Don't worry,
Doctor. I don't find the Paul Jones

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particularly erotic.

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Don't you do anything modern?

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Oh, goodness, yes.

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Suddenly the lights are dead, and they
begin to play the tango.

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Mr. Top puts the rollers between his
teeth.

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See the lady?

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They glide across the floor, cheek to
cheek. You would not get a hand between

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them. I close these windows, Gupta,
otherwise you could have a very deterred

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night. Don't you listen to the music,
Mr. Tom? The music can have a very

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disturbing effect, Gupta.

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The sensuous, insidious rhythms, the
incessant beat of the drum. It can bring

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out the baseless animal instincts.

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Civilization is only skin deep, Gupta.

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You've only got to scratch figures to
find the savage.

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Just a moment.

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I think that's a rumba.

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I don't want to miss that. Excuse me.

145
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Very nice, Eileen. We can't go on
meeting like this.

146
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Oh, be quiet.

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Before you abandon all restraint, I'll
have you know I'm a sick man.

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00:07:38,450 --> 00:07:42,550
You're not acting like a sick man. Hey,
did you enjoy the dance last night?

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Not really.

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There weren't enough men. Oh, yes.

151
00:07:45,471 --> 00:07:48,609
Well, listen, we're having a little do
tonight. Private ward, nine o 'clock,

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soft light, sweet music, a few twiglets.
Why don't you come and bring a few

153
00:07:51,170 --> 00:07:53,030
friends? Is it somebody's birthday?

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In a manner of speaking, I'm hoping it's
going to be mine.

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I'm not sure I'd like to say that.

156
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Well, what do you say?

157
00:07:59,071 --> 00:08:01,889
Are you sure it'll be all right? Yeah,
it's all been arranged.

158
00:08:01,890 --> 00:08:05,629
A few drinks, light refreshments, a
little dancing, a sort of group therapy.

159
00:08:05,630 --> 00:08:06,680
Nine o 'clock? Yes.

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00:08:06,681 --> 00:08:09,969
Private wing? That's right. You can't
miss it. It'll be the room with the

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00:08:09,970 --> 00:08:13,530
balloons. Well, I'm not doing anything
tonight.

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Right. See you later.

163
00:08:18,461 --> 00:08:25,189
Is it all fixed up? All arranged. The
word's gone out. There should be quite a

164
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crowd. Did you get the drink? Yes,
vodka.

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A Cossack's revenge. They won't know
what's in a... Well, I'm not drinking

166
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It's not good for you. Of course it's
good for you. How do you think Cossacks

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get down on their knees and throw their
legs about?

168
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Who protects the joints? It also has the
advantage of being odourless and

169
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tasteless. Well, if it's odourless and
tasteless, why bother to drink it?

170
00:08:42,330 --> 00:08:45,040
Because it can also render you legless
and senseless.

171
00:08:45,041 --> 00:08:48,609
Well, I'm not drinking that. Don't
worry, Norman. I'll get some vermouth

172
00:08:48,610 --> 00:08:52,340
some... Very nice, Archie. That'll add a
little class to the proceedings.

173
00:08:52,660 --> 00:08:54,360
Mind you, nothing below 80 % proof.

174
00:08:54,361 --> 00:08:57,119
Right, now, did you get the record
player, Norman? Oh, yes.

175
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,170
Mother brought it in.

176
00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:02,850
Where's the plug?

177
00:09:03,020 --> 00:09:04,580
No, no, you wind it up.

178
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:05,970
Wind it up?

179
00:09:06,540 --> 00:09:09,080
Well, this is a dance, not Desert Island
Discs.

180
00:09:09,081 --> 00:09:12,599
You can't break off in the middle of a
dance to wind up the gramophone. Oh,

181
00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:15,499
don't worry, I'll be in charge of this.
No, you won't, cos you'll be dancing.

182
00:09:15,500 --> 00:09:18,559
Oh, do I have to? Of course you have to,
love. Come on and practice those steps

183
00:09:18,560 --> 00:09:20,060
I showed you. I still can't turn.

184
00:09:20,061 --> 00:09:23,179
That's all right. We'll wedge the door
open for you. Excuse me, Arthur. Can I

185
00:09:23,180 --> 00:09:23,659
borrow that?

186
00:09:23,660 --> 00:09:25,770
Here you are, Norman. Here's your
partner.

187
00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:30,690
Gentlemen!

188
00:09:32,551 --> 00:09:39,819
Why is that young man dancing with a
broom? Because he couldn't find a woman,

189
00:09:39,820 --> 00:09:43,219
mate. We're a very man -oriented group
round here, mate, and it's either the

190
00:09:43,220 --> 00:09:46,499
broom or me and people are beginning to
talk. Nonsense, Mr Figgis. There's far

191
00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:49,450
too much laxity around here. Things need
to be tightened up.

192
00:09:49,451 --> 00:09:52,499
I've even heard that the strong drink
has been smuggled into the hospital.

193
00:09:52,500 --> 00:09:53,459
Strong drink?

194
00:09:53,460 --> 00:09:55,630
Did you hear that, Archie? Whatever
next?

195
00:09:55,631 --> 00:09:57,199
Well, I shall get to the bottom of it.

196
00:09:57,200 --> 00:10:01,079
I'm sure Mr Thorpe would be surprised
and shocked to know what's going on if

197
00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:04,379
were to know that one of his patients
was whirling around on the end of a

198
00:10:04,380 --> 00:10:05,339
He'd be appalled.

199
00:10:05,340 --> 00:10:06,420
Now, watch me, Norman.

200
00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:09,090
It's a quarter turn followed by a
quarter chassis.

201
00:10:09,440 --> 00:10:13,039
Slow, quick, quick step. Keep your
weight on the ball's feet. Listen to

202
00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:15,019
you've got and what you're doing to
that.

203
00:10:15,020 --> 00:10:16,100
Mr Thorpe!

204
00:10:17,660 --> 00:10:20,490
Ah, there you are, Mr Thorpe. Good
evening, Matron. Is it?

205
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:22,050
A day to part.

206
00:10:22,520 --> 00:10:25,230
The stands of this hospital are in
decline, Mr Thorpe.

207
00:10:25,231 --> 00:10:27,679
Discipline is lax and the patients are
out of hand.

208
00:10:27,680 --> 00:10:29,080
It is not a good evening.

209
00:10:29,700 --> 00:10:33,789
Quite. Now, will you excuse me for my
brother's time? Time? You showed no

210
00:10:33,790 --> 00:10:36,449
of tiredness this afternoon when you
were dancing with that broom.

211
00:10:36,450 --> 00:10:39,510
I was astonished, Mr Thorpe. Well, it
was all quite harmless.

212
00:10:39,511 --> 00:10:43,229
Well, I wouldn't have described it as
harmless. You appear to be in the grip

213
00:10:43,230 --> 00:10:44,310
Saturday night fever.

214
00:10:44,530 --> 00:10:46,770
No wonder the health service is in
disarray.

215
00:10:47,550 --> 00:10:51,250
Are you aware that strong drink is being
smuggled into this hospital?

216
00:10:51,530 --> 00:10:55,380
Strong drink? Sure. Of course I'm sure.
We're finding the empties everywhere.

217
00:10:55,790 --> 00:10:58,930
We must be vigilant, Mr Thorpe. Right.

218
00:10:58,931 --> 00:11:02,579
But if you need me, I'll be in the
private wing. I must get some rest. I'm

219
00:11:02,580 --> 00:11:03,399
call later.

220
00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:04,079
On call?

221
00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:06,550
Well, I only hope you have the strength
to answer.

222
00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:10,500
Remember, Mr Thorpe, many are called,
but few are chosen.

223
00:11:13,700 --> 00:11:17,499
Yes, I quite agree. And I think you're
worrying I'm duly drinking in the

224
00:11:17,500 --> 00:11:19,260
hospital. Not my patients.

225
00:11:19,891 --> 00:11:25,139
That's right. Pour it all in, then we'll
get rid of the bottles.

226
00:11:25,140 --> 00:11:28,309
Listen. What happened to the rest of it?
You haven't drunk it, have you? Of

227
00:11:28,310 --> 00:11:32,029
course not. I'm still standing, aren't
I? Now Norman's taken some down already.

228
00:11:32,030 --> 00:11:35,529
No -one will suspect him. And why should
they? A carafe containing a colourless

229
00:11:35,530 --> 00:11:40,229
liquid looking exactly like water, but
in reality a lethal cocktail guaranteed

230
00:11:40,230 --> 00:11:42,710
to take the starch out of the stiffest
apron.

231
00:11:43,030 --> 00:11:44,530
Come on, let's get rid of these.

232
00:11:44,710 --> 00:11:45,760
What are you doing?

233
00:11:45,990 --> 00:11:47,070
Why aren't you in bed?

234
00:11:47,071 --> 00:11:50,169
We're going to see the late film. You
said it would be all right. Don't you

235
00:11:50,170 --> 00:11:51,730
remember? No, I don't remember.

236
00:11:51,731 --> 00:11:54,889
Oh, you did, didn't he, Archie? Yes, I
remember it distinctly.

237
00:11:54,890 --> 00:11:58,029
It's all right for you to go and watch
television. I'm stuck in this place.

238
00:11:58,030 --> 00:11:59,230
I'm fed up, I tell you.

239
00:11:59,550 --> 00:12:03,589
I'm out on my feet, but no one cares. We
care, Gupta. That's why we're going. We

240
00:12:03,590 --> 00:12:07,090
know you'll run off your feet. We just
don't want to be a burden to you.

241
00:12:07,091 --> 00:12:08,849
Why are you being nice to me, Figgis?

242
00:12:08,850 --> 00:12:12,370
I'm not being nice. Just common
humanity, that's all. Well, we'll be

243
00:12:12,371 --> 00:12:15,809
If I was not on tonight, I would not be
watching television.

244
00:12:15,810 --> 00:12:18,760
Down in the social club, dancing with
the big English lady.

245
00:12:19,550 --> 00:12:20,890
I'm fed up, I tell you.

246
00:12:21,190 --> 00:12:22,290
I hate night duty.

247
00:12:28,900 --> 00:12:29,950
Oh,

248
00:12:29,951 --> 00:12:35,359
that's very strange. What do you think,
Archie? There's definitely something

249
00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:36,410
there, isn't there?

250
00:12:42,140 --> 00:12:43,200
Yes, it's fluoride.

251
00:12:45,700 --> 00:12:47,020
They've overdone it again.

252
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:49,680
They don't care, do they?

253
00:12:59,790 --> 00:13:01,230
compulsory mass medication.

254
00:13:01,370 --> 00:13:04,909
I don't agree with it. After all, what
does it get you? A perfect set of

255
00:13:04,910 --> 00:13:08,229
choppers and a stomach like the inside
of an old kettle. I'll throw it away.

256
00:13:08,230 --> 00:13:09,280
I'll look after it.

257
00:13:10,481 --> 00:13:15,189
What are you waiting for? You go, enjoy
yourself.

258
00:13:15,190 --> 00:13:17,540
Don't worry about Gupta. No one cares
about him.

259
00:13:21,110 --> 00:13:25,009
Are you quite comfortable, staff? Oh,
please, don't get up. I'd hate to

260
00:13:25,010 --> 00:13:26,850
you. Where are the patients?

261
00:13:27,210 --> 00:13:28,710
They're watching television.

262
00:13:28,750 --> 00:13:29,800
They should be in bed.

263
00:13:30,390 --> 00:13:31,810
No, I should be in bed.

264
00:13:32,010 --> 00:13:35,170
What? I've been on all day and all
night. I'm very tired.

265
00:13:35,510 --> 00:13:41,510
All I want to do is rest my head on a
deep, soft pillow and sleep forever.

266
00:13:42,270 --> 00:13:46,530
Now, come along, Star. You mustn't give
in like this. Remember, you're a nurse.

267
00:13:47,250 --> 00:13:48,530
Please don't call me that.

268
00:13:48,850 --> 00:13:51,310
I'm a man. You are a woman.

269
00:13:51,830 --> 00:13:53,410
Very beautiful woman.

270
00:13:53,870 --> 00:13:54,920
What?

271
00:13:55,110 --> 00:13:57,010
Really? Stop. Sit down.

272
00:13:57,250 --> 00:14:00,080
Take the weight off your feet. Let us do
the backward away.

273
00:14:01,940 --> 00:14:02,990
Now then, stop.

274
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:07,420
I, uh... I know that you've been on duty
a long time.

275
00:14:07,421 --> 00:14:10,539
And I know that you've been under
considerable strain.

276
00:14:10,540 --> 00:14:14,420
I... I do sympathize.

277
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:17,140
But you really mustn't give in like
this.

278
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,800
Perhaps I can get you some assistance.

279
00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:20,650
Thank you.

280
00:15:59,130 --> 00:16:02,029
Well, where are all the girls?

281
00:16:02,030 --> 00:16:04,409
Don't worry, they'll be along in a
minute. I knew it, it's going to be a

282
00:16:04,410 --> 00:16:08,249
complete sham. No, it isn't. They'll be
down here in droves. I don't think we

283
00:16:08,250 --> 00:16:11,529
should be in here. Oh, will you be
quiet, Archie? Pour him a drink while I

284
00:16:11,530 --> 00:16:13,030
the urdy -gurdy. Yes, all right.

285
00:16:33,911 --> 00:16:35,939
a veteran.

286
00:16:35,940 --> 00:16:36,990
What did you think?

287
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:39,060
It's very smooth, isn't it?

288
00:16:39,260 --> 00:16:41,310
Well, of course. It was mixed by an
expert.

289
00:16:41,311 --> 00:16:45,499
Steady, Norman. You don't want to overdo
it. Let's see what we've got here.

290
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:46,640
A runaway train.

291
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:48,840
A teddy bear's picnic.

292
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:52,140
A change in guards at Buckingham Palace.

293
00:16:52,620 --> 00:16:55,210
We can't play these. Haven't you got
anything else?

294
00:16:55,211 --> 00:16:55,919
Oh, here we are.

295
00:16:55,920 --> 00:16:56,970
Begin the begin.

296
00:16:56,980 --> 00:16:58,260
Ah, that's more like it.

297
00:17:05,671 --> 00:17:11,318
Well, what are we going to do now? Send
out the three brooms?

298
00:17:11,319 --> 00:17:12,199
Don't worry.

299
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:13,580
They'll be along in a minute.

300
00:17:14,020 --> 00:17:15,640
There you are. What did I tell you?

301
00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:18,490
Coming, darling.

302
00:17:18,491 --> 00:17:20,299
Where are the others?

303
00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:23,239
They're not coming. What do you mean
they're not coming? When I told them it

304
00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:24,539
you three, they wouldn't come.

305
00:17:24,540 --> 00:17:27,679
I knew it was going to be a complete
sham. No, it isn't. There'll be others.

306
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:30,819
word's gone out. You're lucky you got
here before the rush. You want to seize

307
00:17:30,820 --> 00:17:31,870
your opportunity.

308
00:17:32,420 --> 00:17:33,470
What's that music?

309
00:17:33,780 --> 00:17:34,830
It's the beginning.

310
00:17:35,540 --> 00:17:36,740
Would you care to dance?

311
00:17:37,100 --> 00:17:38,150
I don't know it.

312
00:17:38,250 --> 00:17:41,410
Then you'll just have to put yourself
into my hands.

313
00:17:42,250 --> 00:17:46,370
Let me conjure up a tropical night heavy
with the scent of jasmine.

314
00:17:47,210 --> 00:17:48,260
Excuse us.

315
00:17:50,550 --> 00:17:51,730
There's not much room.

316
00:17:51,970 --> 00:17:53,830
Then we'll just have to dance closely.

317
00:17:55,670 --> 00:17:56,720
What's the matter?

318
00:17:56,730 --> 00:17:59,090
Your moustache is tickling my ear.

319
00:17:59,350 --> 00:18:00,790
Oh, concentrate for a moment.

320
00:18:01,030 --> 00:18:02,450
Imagine an island paradise.

321
00:18:03,570 --> 00:18:06,310
And down on the shore, an orchestra
playing.

322
00:18:06,510 --> 00:18:07,570
And even the palms.

323
00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:11,680
seem to be swaying. It brings back a
memory evergreen.

324
00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:14,150
That's lovely.

325
00:18:14,980 --> 00:18:16,300
Do you make it up yourself?

326
00:18:16,380 --> 00:18:17,440
I'm a master of words.

327
00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:23,310
That's too slow. Would you speed it up,
you idiot?

328
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:26,630
Who are you calling an idiot? You be
careful. I've been drinking.

329
00:18:26,740 --> 00:18:30,499
Watch it, Archie. He's on his fourth
class. It's not my fault he can't hold

330
00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,910
drink. Wind it up, Figgis. You wind it
up yourself.

331
00:18:33,120 --> 00:18:36,910
Will you be quiet, Norman? I'm talking
to the organ grinder, not his monkey.

332
00:18:38,060 --> 00:18:39,110
I want more speed.

333
00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:40,820
Well, I'll give you more speed.

334
00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:48,910
There we are, team.

335
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:50,600
Well, we're 78 already.

336
00:18:50,601 --> 00:18:53,139
Would you tell them to stop messing
about with this ground? All right, all

337
00:18:53,140 --> 00:18:56,019
right. Come on, let's see what else
we've got. There we are. Now look, a

338
00:18:56,020 --> 00:18:56,879
of Glendale.

339
00:18:56,880 --> 00:19:00,719
Right, I am going to dance. Now I'm
going to dance and no one is going to

340
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:01,770
me. Come here, Ivy.

341
00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:06,440
I shall lead with my left foot, then go
into a reverse turn.

342
00:19:06,810 --> 00:19:07,860
Followed by a shaggy.

343
00:19:09,090 --> 00:19:11,930
Flow, quick, quick. Flow, flow.

344
00:19:11,931 --> 00:19:12,969
Excuse me.

345
00:19:12,970 --> 00:19:15,030
No. Excuse me, darling.

346
00:19:15,250 --> 00:19:16,300
Say. I do.

347
00:19:16,301 --> 00:19:19,269
Shove off. You've had your turn. Don't
talk to me like that, you little

348
00:19:19,270 --> 00:19:23,170
pipsqueak. Don't call me a pipsqueak.
I'm feeling very aggressive.

349
00:19:23,171 --> 00:19:26,409
You want to be careful, Archie. Drink
gets some people like that.

350
00:19:26,410 --> 00:19:29,829
Anyway, there's no need to fall out.
There'll be plenty more along the

351
00:19:29,830 --> 00:19:32,630
No, but this music... Oh, come on,
Arlie. Have a drink.

352
00:19:33,170 --> 00:19:34,910
There, now. This should sort you out.

353
00:19:35,450 --> 00:19:36,950
You'll feel better after that.

354
00:19:45,330 --> 00:19:46,970
It's like silk, isn't it?

355
00:19:47,610 --> 00:19:49,790
It's more like water, if you ask me.

356
00:19:50,470 --> 00:19:53,170
I think I'll push it up.

357
00:19:53,710 --> 00:19:57,929
Did you see that? She thinks it tastes
like water. It's going to hit her

358
00:19:57,930 --> 00:19:58,980
like a bomb.

359
00:19:59,630 --> 00:20:02,160
Let's see if I can find a tango to get
her in the mood.

360
00:20:14,160 --> 00:20:15,960
This is your day of destiny, my dear.

361
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,790
Prepare yourself for the experience of a
lifetime.

362
00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:21,520
Figgis is about to perform the tango.

363
00:20:21,860 --> 00:20:24,600
Rudolph Valentino, eat your arca.

364
00:20:33,140 --> 00:20:34,190
Go, go!

365
00:20:34,191 --> 00:20:36,359
Figgis, what do you think you're doing?

366
00:20:36,360 --> 00:20:39,179
I'm just having a bit of a knees -up,
Doctor. Knees -up? Not my year of

367
00:20:39,180 --> 00:20:41,969
experience. I've never seen you this
effective. I'm sorry, Doctor.

368
00:20:41,970 --> 00:20:44,020
Tell him to sing his hook. Shut up,
Norman.

369
00:20:44,021 --> 00:20:46,909
We didn't mean any harm, and please,
don't blame Nurse.

370
00:20:46,910 --> 00:20:49,920
We just thought it would be rather
frantic. Rather frantic?

371
00:20:49,921 --> 00:20:53,349
Spectacular. You're off balance, Figgis.
Your interpretation was abysmal, and

372
00:20:53,350 --> 00:20:54,789
your back caught you as a joke.

373
00:20:54,790 --> 00:20:56,710
I suppose you think you could do better.

374
00:20:56,711 --> 00:21:01,369
View the music, Figgis. Let it bring out
the laughing in you. Picture that

375
00:21:01,370 --> 00:21:04,029
crowded fellow, Montmartre, with the
flickering candles.

376
00:21:04,030 --> 00:21:06,200
See her wanton movement through the
flame.

377
00:21:06,570 --> 00:21:08,730
You take a rose of colour, but she...

378
00:21:08,940 --> 00:21:11,470
and push aside her admire and take her
by the wrist.

379
00:21:22,020 --> 00:21:23,100
Mr Thorpe!

380
00:21:23,560 --> 00:21:25,660
Have you taken leave of your sentence?

381
00:21:25,661 --> 00:21:28,519
Where do you think you are? Hammersmith
Ballet?

382
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:31,940
I was just giving a little demonstration
meeting.

383
00:21:32,260 --> 00:21:33,740
In your dressing gown?

384
00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:35,180
Good heavens, I forgot.

385
00:21:35,181 --> 00:21:37,639
You seem to have forgotten everything,
Mr Thorpe.

386
00:21:37,640 --> 00:21:40,859
You've forgotten your position in this
hospital, you've forgotten your duty to

387
00:21:40,860 --> 00:21:44,470
your patients, and you've forgotten your
responsibility as a surgeon.

388
00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:47,080
I'll see you in the morning, when you're
sober.

389
00:21:47,780 --> 00:21:49,240
Nurse, come with me.

390
00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:50,860
Beat it, I can explain.

391
00:21:51,820 --> 00:21:52,870
Kick it.

392
00:21:53,140 --> 00:21:57,179
That's done it. I said it would be a
sham. Poor old Thorpe. Well, I thought

393
00:21:57,180 --> 00:22:00,479
was very good. I could just see that
cellar in Monty Martyr with its

394
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:04,039
vandals and her mountain movements
through the plain. Shut up, Norman,

395
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:06,750
drunk. Have I really? Yes, drunk as a
fiddler's bitch.

396
00:22:06,950 --> 00:22:08,330
I know one thing I wish I was.

397
00:22:08,331 --> 00:22:10,549
I was going to be out of pay in the
morning.

398
00:22:10,550 --> 00:22:12,600
Well, there's only one thing for it,
Roy.

399
00:22:12,670 --> 00:22:13,720
Yeah.

400
00:22:14,150 --> 00:22:15,200
Why not?

401
00:22:16,250 --> 00:22:17,300
Cheers.

402
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:34,730
Ciao, Grandma.

403
00:22:35,820 --> 00:22:36,870
Ciao,

404
00:22:38,100 --> 00:22:42,560
Grandma.

405
00:22:42,610 --> 00:22:47,160
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